What Would I Do with $700 Billion Dollars
Posted on September 25th, 2008 by Sterkworks
What would I do with $700 billion dollars?
- Pay off my townhouse and car. I would be completely out of debt.
- Pay off all my relative’s debts.
- Buy a rambler.
- Pay someone to clean my rambler.
- Pay for a friend’s adoption costs.
- Pay someone to take care of the yard work for my rambler.
- Have a house visit by a massage therapist weekly.
- Quit my job. Get a teaching certificate and teach Jr. High School.
- Bring current every home owner who is behind on their mortgage. Put enough into their accounts so that they can get a non-subprime mortgage.
- Travel with my daughter at every school break she gets.
- Donate money to homeless shelters and food banks.
- Donate money to organizations that benefit autism, juvenile diabetes, hearing loss/deafness, HIV/Aids, The Human Rights Campaign, and organizations against California Proposition 8.
- Buy the company I used to work for and fire my old boss. Then sell the company.
- Bribe my way into meeting Rachel Maddow.
- Split the rest amongst myself, my family, my friends, and everybody who follows me on Twitter.
I pretty much figure this list is better than the government’s.
Filed under: Health, gay, Humor, Lesbian, Family, Politics, Place d'employ
Yay! Can’t wait for my cut (I follow you on twitter @travelgirl521)!!!! Awesome post and great idea! I especially love the massage therapist one- that would be on my list along with the townhouse and the car!
I’d be right there with you for most of those. In addition (because hopefully $700 billion would go a long way), I’d cover everyone’s health insurance that they don’t get through their state/federal govt., buy a Jag instead of a Rambler (just because I think that they’re cool), and go back to horse back riding, only this time do it with an emphasis on teaching riding for the disabled. I’d try to fund good sex education programs where they weren’t available, or at the very least fund people who talk about them.
I want a pool boy. Not because I want a pool, or even necessarily a boy, but because the friends that I know who hire pool boys seem to think that they’re pretty adaptable. Said pool boy (or girl) would inspire me to look after my garden much more assiduously than I do at the moment (because I’d be embarrassed not to), be proficient in laundry and cooking meals and spontaneous snacks, and look after my kids when a new book that I wanted to read was available at the library. They would also be proficient in (non-sexual) massage, and if they had training with autistic kids it would be a huge bonus, and even more so if they would consent to accompanying our family on holidays so that we could have a bit of help. Proficiency in pre-puberty manicures for Seventeen obsessed girls and beauty makeovers would be a bonus, as would be willingness to participate in extremely strenuous physical activity with a 12 year old autistic boy.
I would love to sponsor doctors through immigration to come and work in rural areas of Ontario, and provide scholarships for children of families containing special needs or cancer survivor children, as that’s what we’re most familiar with. I would try to make sure that every pediatric oncology ward had a child play or art/music therapy specialist. I would provide subsidies for help for families of multiple birth children where one or more of the children have special needs. I would hire supermodels to come to my house for an hour and tell my girls that even though they’re skinny with no boobs at age 12, it has no bearing on what their future life will be like (I may not have an enormous amount of respect for supermodels, but the girls do).
I would go nuts on kiva.org funding microloans, and I would spend money carefully but lavishly to help to fund candidates that I believed in in areas where I felt it could make a difference.
I’d take my husband away for a trip anywhere he wanted for about 2 months with just the two of us, because it would be very nice to spend some time alone. I would build myself a Snozelen room with all sorts of soothing things where I could retreat, a kitchen with a huge fireplace in it because I love fireplaces, and a floor to ceiling library with huge comfy armchairs, a fireplace, and a ladder on the wall, because if there’s anything more awesome than a big personal library with a ladder that swings across the wall, I don’t know what it is.
Thanks for the 10 minutes of fun imagination time!
I would buy a farm house with lots of land, ok not a lot of land but enough to have ducks. And some one to clean up after them, becouse EWW…and a pool, I don’t want to forget the pool.
I would take my husband to every Disney park all over the globe.
I would create a animal shelter, so they have a second chance.
I follow you on twitter via cmuser’s account…does that count??
Also, I taught jr high for four years (loved it) and now teach 3rd grade (love it, too!) Does that win you over? :0)