My Gay Mormon Ring
Tonight I had a second interview for a marketing position at a company only twenty minutes from home. I met with the CEO last week. He loved me and I hit it off really well with him. We think alike: strategy, planning, order, ROI, etc. The company makes medallions, shields, badges, etc., for the armed services and police and firefighters. Okay, so the product isn’t super exciting, but there seemed to be a lot of potential with the job.
I met with the owner tonight and I couldn’t read him worth shit. He was all over the place. Very proud and showing me all of the marketing pieces they had done and how much he did or didn’t like them. (They were not very good.) Then he saw my ring.
“Is that the Young Women’s Holiness of Light ring? Let me see it.” I took off my ring, trying not to to swallow my tongue. “Yes, it is. Someone took our design and added to it.” He then spent ten minutes telling me about the ring and pulled out the catalog it was first in. The company started out in the 90s manufacturing Mormon rings, I found out.
My hopes for the job sank. “Where did you get it?” he asked, and I feigned ignorance, “at some fair in Salt Lake about eight years ago.” What I wanted to say? “I got it at gay pride you idiot and it is a rainbow ring.”
Although I doubt I will be offered the job, I don’t think I would want to go back in the closet again. And there, I think I would. Shit. They make Mormon jewelry. Now I need to find a ring that says “Carpet Muncher” so nobody will make that mistake again.
My Gay Ring His Mormon Ring
Filed under: Life Lessons, Lesbian, Utah, Marketing
Holiness of Light? That sounds very Catholic to me.
Funny, though, those rings do bear a resemblance. Who new faith, divine nature, individual worth, knowledge, choice & accountability, good works, and integrity were so gay?
Seriously though, that sucks about the job. I guess you could always just be yourself since you don’t think the job is going to pan out anyway.
Holiness of Light? Never heard of it and I was a little miss young women’s back in the day….
@Sra and @Danette Yea, they made up names that sound churchie for their products. They were not commissioned by the church, but “appeal” to Mormons. He showed me their latest line of CTR shaped rings that had country flags in them instead of CTR.
CTR:
Choose the right? It’s a Republican thing.
Capture the rebels. There will be no one to stop us this time.
Count the rocks. Popular at Leavenworth.
Cut the rug. And dance the night away.
Cross the road. Why did the chicken?
Cute tiny rabbits. Until they bite your hand.
I’ve read 2 blog posts outloud to my husband. Your’s was the 2nd. I can not. wait. to see your carpet muncher ring. That would be so freakin’ awesome.
May I recommend purchasing a Carpet Muncher ring done up in pave diamonds and set in a bubble-letter font? The diamonds say “classy,” the font says “sassy!”
If such a thing doesn’t exist, it should. I’d buy one. In pink, of course.
I like your gay ring. Screw being closeted!
@pants yes, screw being closeted, but once you’ve been fired for being gay, one is cautious.