I have a love/hate relationship with MSNBC’s Morning Joe. Of course, I never watched Imus who was on prior to Morning Joe. I switched from CNN in the morning to MSNBC when they changed their programming after the “nappy-headed” incident.

It seems bad enough to have the entire show sponsored by Starbucks; especially after Mika continually ridicules Joe for drinking the fattening versions of coffee beverages. Product placement gone awry.

So to be fair, if Joe gets his own coffee blend, which will not pass these lips, the other MSNBC personalities should get blends of their own. After perusing the Starbucks menu, I offer the following:

• Mika Brzezinski Breakfast Blend – Bright, clean, light-bodied with a mild intensity.
• Willie Geist Guatemala Casi Cielo – Rich, smooth and slightly sweet with medium intensity.
• Andrea Mitchell Espresso – Rich, dense, and caramelly sweet with bold intensity.
• Chuck Todd Ethiopia Sidamo – complex, distinctively lemony flavor with bold intensity.
• Chris Matthews Shade Grown Mexican – A crisp, slightly nutty taste with medium intensity.
• Ed Schultz Organic Kenya – Big, juicy notes of grapefruit with a bold intensity.
• Keith Olbermann Gold Coast Blend – Big, full-bodied, complex with extra bold intensity.
• Rachel Maddow Sumatra – Intensely earthy and aromatic with extra bold intensity.

And last but not least…

Pat Buchanan Instant – Like decaf, what the hell is the point?

Long ago I gave up making New Year’s resolutions. Instead, I designate a theme for the year. This method is wonderful, because a theme touches each aspect of my life; health, career, personal, social, etc. It works for me. It helps me refocus when life seems to get bogged down. Whatever life throws me during the year, I reflect on my theme and how it can help me. It has never failed.

My theme for 2010 is INVIGORATE. What a great word. It exudes life and energy and motion. Thus, so will this year. It will be great.

Don’t get me wrong; there were some wonderful things about 2009. I’m just glad we only have one day of it left. So in this final day of 2009, let me reflect on the good and bad.

Best movie: Inglorious Basterds.

Worst movie: Old Dogs. Really John? I can’t believe you were in this movie. Of course, yes I can, because you starred in Battlefield Earth, so it shouldn’t surprise me.

Best Twitter follower: @judywriter. Judy thought I was funny and recommended to one of her friends that she too follow me. Voila. That follower eventually became my girlfriend. To this day, we both thank @judywriter.

Worst Twitter follower: Any of the varieties of F*ck Britney. The avatars were enough to make me gag.

Best job: A two week stint at a company in January as their director of marketing. Two weeks because even though I showed my non-compete to the owners and they ran it by their lawyer, when my former employer somehow figured I was working there, he threatened a lawsuit.

Worst job: This job was so bad that I was more stressed working there than I am unemployed and out of money. I accepted the internet marketing manager position because I needed a job. And on day two, I found out from everyone who had worked there before that the owner got rid of employees before their three month anniversary. But the three months of income helped stretch my savings a little longer.

Alice Tully Hall

Best date: A walk through NYC ending on the steps of Alice Tully Hall at the Lincoln Center.

Worst date: none

Best job interview: Who gets to say they interviewed on Wall Street? Me. And I was glad to be able to take the subway to the financial district, ask for directions from a multitude of individuals, and go through an amazing security screening process. I had no expectations of actually getting the job, but the experience was priceless.

Worst job interview: The three month interview process that landed me in the final two candidates for the job. Two days after the final interview I pretty much figured the other person got the job; which he/she did. But after three months, four-hour interviews and blistered feet from facility tours, one would think I could get a personalized call rather than a form letter from an assistant HR person.

So here is to 2009, the good, bad and ugly. Glad you are over and looking forward to a glorious 2010.

Sometimes, like many of us, I reserve a domain name just because I like it and will figure out what to do with it later. Trying to possibly make a little money while deciding what to do, I sign up those domains in the Google adsense program for domains.

Domain Disapproval

As mentioned in the program policies, domains that are submitted for the AdSense for domains program may not include certain terms in the URL. Terms in the URL may not contain or be related to any of the following:

• Pornography, adult, or mature terms. This includes, but is not limited to, any terms that refer to or suggest nudity, partial nudity, sexual imagery/acts, lewd/graphic or profane language.
• Violent or racially intolerant language or any other form of hate speech directed against an individual, group, or organization
• Excessive profanity
• Illicit drugs and drug paraphernalia
• Gambling or casino-related content
• Weapons, such as firearms, ammunition, balisongs, butterfly knives, and brass knuckles
• Beer or hard alcohol
• Tobacco or tobacco-related products
• Prescription drugs
• Promotion of an illegal activity or an activity that infringes on the legal rights of others.
• References to tragedies or other sensitive current events
• Any other terms that are illegal, promote illegal activity, or infringe on the legal rights of others.

So homophobic Google, gonna get your act together?

The Oxford University Press 2009 word of the year is “unfriend.”

My Mormon cousin is on local TV every week, and many fans become her friend on Facebook. One individual was chatting with her and saw my name as one of her friends. “Do you know Sterkworks is a lesbian?” the friend asked. “Do you know Sterkworks is my cousin?” the response, and she was very happy to unfriend his ass.

Merriam-Webster’s word of the year is “admonish.”

What a boring word of the year, which came about from the whole Joe Wilson outburst at President Obama. I admonish Merriam-Webster to select a more interesting word of the year in 2010.

The Global Language Monitor word of the year is “Twitter.”

I have my own rules for the word Twitter. Twitter is a noun and should be used in a sentence as such. “Do you use Twitter?” not “do you Twitter?” Tweet is a verb, and you would say “do you tweet?”

Webster’s New World word of the year is “distracted-driving.”

If you text on the road and practice distracted-driving, you are a fucktard.

Sterkworks’ word of the year is “fucktard.”

I have revisited that oldie but goodie, and use it only in reference to cars and their drivers. When 15 cars park at the end of my driveway so I cannot leave my house, I consider them a gaggle of fucktards.

Sterkworks’ Gay Agenda, Friday December 18, 2009

• I already dropped of my daughter at school. Now I must wait for a load of laundry to finish so I can get dressed. Laundry. It never ends.
• Figure out where in the hell I put the birthday card I bought.
• Go to the store (yuck) and buy a cake. I was going to make one, but realized it would cost as much to buy everything to make one as to buy one outright. After all these years I am still domestically challenged.
• Pick up daughter from school, a special birthday treat.
• Go to dinner and a movie with my sis and her family. That is what my daughter selected as her birthday party. So Mexican and Avatar it is. Then cake and ice cream after.

As soon as today is over, we start celebrating Christmas. I have successfully managed all these years to make sure the celebrations are completely separate. And my daughter; she just loves all the presents.

But alas, I need that final $93 you protect, and to retrieve it, I need to close you. So I shall.

Parting is such sweet sorrow.

There is a Walmart two minutes from my house. The nearest grocery stores are 10 minutes away. Not a long distance I know, but if I just need milk and bread, I want a quickie. And sometimes when I’m down to my last penny, I know I can buy some food at Walmart for cheaper than I can anywhere else.

When I sneak into Walmart, I look around for people with cameras, not wanting to get caught and posted on the People of Walmart site. I am afraid I will run into one of my Twitter friends who I know in real life. Then it occurs to me that like a Mormon running into a liquor store to buy gifts for their heathen friends and running into their bishop, I know that if I run into a friend, they too are being un-politically correct and feeding the nasty horrible beast.

The worst part of being in a Walmart? Getting dizzy and sick. The bigger the store, the bigger the chance that my mystery illness will kick in. Even worse is the knowledge that if it came right down to it and I needed the money to feed my daughter, I wouldn’t be physically able to be a Walmart greeter. That my friends, sucks.

Lego Taj Mahal

Didn’t someone call the Taj Mahal man’s greatest erection for a woman? Nobody is ever too old for Legos. Or erections. If you like that kind of thing.

My grandmother used to sit on our living room floor and play Legos with my brothers. Of course, I don’t think she ever talked about erections.

Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock T-shirt

You can’t watch the Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock episode of The Big Bang Theory without trying it out for yourself. Easy to memorize, but difficult to remember what action beats what action.

Barbie’s Ladies of the 80s Dolls

Choose from Joan Jett, Cyndi Lauper or Debbie Harry. Gotta love it.

Okay. I confess that these are things I want for Christmas. But they are totally impractical. Well, except the T-shirt. And maybe the Barbie Doll. I’ll pass on the erection, however.

A few months ago, I found this video on YouTube. I keep watching it over and over again. It makes sense to me. I wish it would have been available a long time ago. I think of situations I would have handled differently.

I think of this video every day. It has become a positive influence in my life.