Do Mormons and Lesbian Oral Sex Mix?
I had a lovely lunch of shrimp, scallops, and chicken in a wine and garlic sauce, with brown rice. She had soup and cream cheese won tons. And she had a lot of questions. She is one of my best friends, a Mormon, and young enough to be my daughter. She is wise beyond her years. I love her and her husband. They are great people.
Knowing I haven’t dated anyone in ages, she asked me what is the equivalent of “it growing back” (hymen I presume) for lesbians. When do we become virgins again?
I told her when the piece of flesh (lingual fraenulum) that connects the tongue to the floor of the mouth isn’t sore or torn any more. “Huh?” was her response. She then proceeded, in between bites of her won tons, to simulate the tongue movements of her version of lesbian oral sex. “I don’t get it.”
I told her to open her mouth, then push her tongue up to the roof of her mouth and hold it for twenty minutes. Okay. That can hurt. So when you are having oral sex enough, you might experience some soreness in that area. She kind of got it, but not really.
Then, she asked me about the correct lesbian protocol of showering before oral sex. Depends on the people involved. Some people would rather taste tuna than ivory soap. You talk. Just like any couple. She was freaking out by this time. I told her she would never get it because she was straight, and that was okay.
She then asked if it would be appropriate to use a latex glove; would that be offensive? I was laughing and told her to just have short nails and don’t wear rings on your fingers. (Like SHE needs any of this advice.) I then threw her a curve and asked if she would deem it necessary to have an enema before having anal sex. That was about the end of the conversation. We had finished our lunch.
I don’t know if I answered her questions, but we were both laughing so damn hard through our lunch that it was totally worth it. And, it made me realize I should probably get back in the game and make sure my info is still correct.
Too funny! I’ve wondered some of those things myself and you came up with a few I had never even considered. All the things you’ve wondered about lesbians, but were afraid to ask! Love the honesty and openess.